“Words are singularly the most powerful force available
to humanity. We can choose to use this force
constructively with words of encouragement, or
destructively using words of despair. Words have energy
and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hinder, to
hurt, to harm, to humiliate and to humble.”
Yehuda Berg
Considering the ‘powerful force’ of the words we utter,
we must discipline ourselves to speak in a way that
conveys respect, gentleness and humility. One of the
clearest sign of a moral life is right speech. Perfecting our
speech is one of the keystones of mature people. Before
speaking take a few moments to contemplate what you
will say and how you will say it; while considering the
impact they will have on the listener/s. Be kind to all and
speak words that are beacons of inspiration, enthusiasm
and encouragement to all. Kind and sweet words are
always music to the ears of the listeners.
Many people are compelled to give voice to any passing
feeling, thought or impression they have. They randomly
dump the contents of their mind without regard to the
significance of what they are saying. When we talk about
trivial matters as in gossiping about others, our attention
is wasted on trivialities.
When we speak we should speak with mindfulness, in a
way to solidify peace and compassion in our characters.
Not only do our words matter, but also the tone which we
use has a huge impact. There are certain rules that
should guide all our communications with others.
Always speak the truth, avoid exaggerations, be
consistent in what you are saying, don’t use double
standards in addressing people, don’t use your words to
manipulate others, and most importantly do not use
words to insult or belittle anyone.
Thich Nhat Hanh, a contemporary Buddhist monk and
global peace worker and writer in his book, Being Peace
states “speaking honestly in any negotiation between
individuals or groups is necessary. Speaking the truth in
a loving way is also necessary.” Hahn recommends only
“loving speech” even when we are communicating about
our differences and disagreements. We must be ‘lovingly
honest’; we must discipline ourselves to speak in a
manner that conveys respect, gentleness, and humility’.
Gary Chapman in his book, Love as a Way of Life uses the
vivid metaphor for words as being either ‘bullets or
seeds’. If we use our words as bullets with a feeling of
superiority and condemnation, we are not going to be
able to restore a relationship to love. If we use our words
as seeds with a feeling of supportiveness and sincere
good will, we can rebuild a relationship in positive and life-
affirming ways.
When we need to talk candidly about something difficult
with another person, we must focus on the conversation
with keen attention and purpose. During the
conversation, we must listen patiently, speak tactfully,
and tell the truth as we understand it. We must align our
words, voice inflection and tone, eye expression, body
language, and actions with our inner awareness in an
honest exchange
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